All Letters

I’ll Tell You What I Want, What I Really Really Want…

Dear Lea, This feels really hard, telling you honestly all the things I really want! Telling you in my last letter all the things that I knew I didn’t want, having already created them for myself felt a damn sight easier than this! I want you to know that regardless...

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Left Wanting…

Dear Lea,As you know, prior to my awakening just over two years ago, my needs and wants were pretty much bottom of my, and consequently other people’s, list.Did I know what it was I did want? Not completely but I sure as hell knew I didn’t want much of what I had –...

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I’ll Be Your Mirror

Hey you, Yes, I know - inappropriate much?! And yet it feels like it's been a common occurrence since we came out and have been together...an avalanche of inappropriate questions and comments which reveal more about the person saying them than the answers they'd get...

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Down To The Bottom (Of It All)

Dear you, Good question! How exactly have we managed to stay together for 2 years, given the potentially explosive nature of our stuff - how Becky's shit triggers mine and mine triggers hers- and with the kids in the mix?! One of the most useful tools we've discovered...

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Kill ‘Em With Kindness

Dear You, Sorry for the delay in writing back. The article that Lea posted on feminism sparked some unexpected controversy with two of our friends so we’ve been a bit ‘self absorbed’ working out what was really going on beneath the surface and whose shit was whose!!...

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Children of Ours

  Hey you, I think it'd require a book to cover the ups and downs of the journey for the kids so far. As you'd expect, mine were both devastated at the breakdown of our family unit. Even now, almost 2 years after their father and I decided to separate, they have their...

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Intimacy

  Dear you, I've mentioned our 'issue' with intimacy a few times, haven't I? Well, it's not been me!!! Surprisingly, I'm the one who's craved intimacy and for a while, I thought I was getting it. Until it became quite clear it wasn't quite what I thought it was!...

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Big Magic

Dear you, We’ve had an interesting few weeks. As part of my birthday present, Lea got tickets to see Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love. She was running a Big Magic Event in London based on her book ‘Big Magic - Creative Living Beyond Fear’. I was afraid!...

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Let’s Talk About Sex

Dear you, Oh dear Lord. I still feel a bit coy about sharing this with you. Obviously, the question burning on everyone’s lips, including yours it would seem, when you announce you’ve run off to become a lesbian is ‘What’s the sex like?’! Well, put simply, the answer...

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Underneath The Stars On A White Horse

  Dear you, I know lots of people say that winning millions on the lottery is the thing that would most change their lives. But for me, ‘life changing’ seems to have decided to gently tiptoe in the back door rather than announcing itself loudly with a fanfare and a...

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True Colours

Dear you, You’re not the first to ask me the "Have you always been gay?" question. Often accompanied by the "Why wait so long to come out?", "Why have children with a man?", "Surely you’re bi and not gay?" and even the really cheeky "Why have you shagged so many men...

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Fireworks

  Dear you, It's not all been a bed of roses. I know it can be easy to focus on the upsides, especially in the beginning when a new relationship is fresh and exciting, but there have been many difficult aspects in making this leap to totally change all our lives....

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Why?

Dear You, So why does someone straight suddenly decide age 42, to leave the father of their two kids, and begin a romantic relationship with a close same sex friend? One of the biggest reasons was that I really didn’t want to get to the end of my life and not have...

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Get Together

Dear you, OK OK!!! So I drop a bombshell like that and then don’t give you enough juicy details!! Well, I think I began to feel we could be good friends when she out-pooed me at Forest School!! As the queen of poo gags and double entendres I am always impressed if...

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We’re Coming Out…

Dear you, I'm not going to beat about the proverbial bush, great choice of pun as you'll soon see... I'm now in a relationship with a woman!!! Can you guess who?? You never will. Most people that know us both would never have put us together in a million years because...

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