All Letters

Building LemonAid: Why It’s Not Free To Join the Community!

In this video, we talk about building the LemonAid community from scratch, why we charge to join, and why we so fully believe in its role and value. Note: Excuse my (Lea) puffy face and squinty eyes in this; I'd had some life-changing news this weekend and it was...

read more

Bent Becky

Guilt is only a burden when you bend down and pick it up... apparently. Unfortunately, I keep bending. Our last post saw Lea talking about whether it’s right that the children should always come first and how, as a couple parenting our four children, we don’t think it...

read more

Should The Children Always Come First?

I believe that making our children the centre of our universe is not the kind of parenting approach that benefits them most to prepare them for the world they’ll be living in as adults. Why not? I can think of at least 3 main reasons... 1. Because in the 'real' adult...

read more

Still The One

So what are the things we do that we credit with us still being together, still loving each other and still wanting to have sex with each other more now than in the beginning?! As we head towards the 3rd anniversary of radically changing our lives we’re in a pensive...

read more

Night At The Circus

We wrote these letters after a Christmas night out with fellow LemonAiders, that also turned into a celebration of us being newly engaged. There was a fair bit of Becky’s stuff around and Lea felt she’d had a night at Becky’s personal Circus... Dear Becky, I found...

read more

Step By Step (Parenting)

We went for a walk in the woods yesterday. All six of us. Nothing very unusual there given we are forest school types...But it struck me as we were taking moody wintery shots of the kids climbing trees and Lea was helping them climb higher, that I am a step-parent....

read more

I’ll Tell You What I Want, What I Really Really Want…

Dear Lea, This feels really hard, telling you honestly all the things I really want! Telling you in my last letter all the things that I knew I didn’t want, having already created them for myself felt a damn sight easier than this! I want you to know that regardless...

read more

Left Wanting…

Dear Lea,As you know, prior to my awakening just over two years ago, my needs and wants were pretty much bottom of my, and consequently other people’s, list.Did I know what it was I did want? Not completely but I sure as hell knew I didn’t want much of what I had –...

read more

I’ll Be Your Mirror

Hey you, Yes, I know - inappropriate much?! And yet it feels like it's been a common occurrence since we came out and have been together...an avalanche of inappropriate questions and comments which reveal more about the person saying them than the answers they'd get...

read more

Down To The Bottom (Of It All)

Dear you, Good question! How exactly have we managed to stay together for 2 years, given the potentially explosive nature of our stuff - how Becky's shit triggers mine and mine triggers hers- and with the kids in the mix?! One of the most useful tools we've discovered...

read more

Kill ‘Em With Kindness

Dear You, Sorry for the delay in writing back. The article that Lea posted on feminism sparked some unexpected controversy with two of our friends so we’ve been a bit ‘self absorbed’ working out what was really going on beneath the surface and whose shit was whose!!...

read more

Children of Ours

  Hey you, I think it'd require a book to cover the ups and downs of the journey for the kids so far. As you'd expect, mine were both devastated at the breakdown of our family unit. Even now, almost 2 years after their father and I decided to separate, they have...

read more

Intimacy

  Dear you, I've mentioned our 'issue' with intimacy a few times, haven't I? Well, it's not been me!!! Surprisingly, I'm the one who's craved intimacy and for a while, I thought I was getting it. Until it became quite clear it wasn't quite what I thought it was!...

read more

Big Magic

Dear you, We’ve had an interesting few weeks. As part of my birthday present, Lea got tickets to see Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love. She was running a Big Magic Event in London based on her book ‘Big Magic - Creative Living Beyond Fear’. I was afraid!...

read more